“This is Jennifer’s Life Book”

This simple title on a large scrap book in a Toronto social worker’s office has provoked much interest and discussion. The office in question is the Adoption Department at the Catholic Children’s Aid Society. The model of “Jennifer’s Life Book” has been developed by the Society’s adoption staff in response to changing needs in adoption practice.

The Society has had an active adoption program for decades and has been innovative and tireless in its search for suitable adoptive families for its wards. As the numbers of healthy Caucasian infants have dwindled the proportion of older children, including sibling groups, has increased. The adoption workers are encountering a significant number of boys and girls who no longer know any of the people who knew them as babies. These are children who have experienced several changes of primary caretakers in the first few years of life. Sometimes they have been born in another province or country. The net result of such turnover in parenting figures is that some children have no clear understanding of who are or are not their birth parents. Making a life book is one way to reduce confusion and to promote the child’s sense of identity.

What is a Life Book?

It is a collection of information about a child’s life that includes historical data, recollections, memorabilia and stories by and about a particular child. The goal is to provide the child with a clear picture of his life in a way that he can understand. The record can also bridge the gap for adoptive parents who have missed part of their child’s development and experiences.

What does it look like?

The physical appearance and size of the book depends on the personal taste of the child or adult who selects it. Ideally the foster parents take the child on a special shopping trip to purchase his special book. A very young child may need a small photo-album whereas a school age child might need the biggest scrap book available. One of the most important characteristics is its durability. It must be able to withstand some heavy wear and tear.

What type of information goes into a Life Book?

The adoption workers at the Society start at the beginning. They try to get a photograph of the hospital where the child was born. They canvassed all the hospitals in Metropolitan Toronto and obtained excellent photographs. These were photocopied and the department has been able to set up a “library” of hospital pictures available for use by any worker who is helping a child compile a life book. In the case of a child who was born outside Canada, photographs of the child’s home country have been obtained and added to the book. The workers next try to get a picture of the child as a newborn, not too easy when five years may have elapsed since the child was born. They attempt to establish developmental milestones such as the age at which the child got his first tooth.

This information gathering may appear simplistic and irrelevant but without it the child’s early years may be almost blank. Recently, a little eight-year-old girl, who was adopted as an older child, was in tears because she was the only child in the class who couldn’t produce her baby pictures for Show and Tell. Foster parents are encouraged to provide pictures of themselves and no book is complete without pictures of foster siblings. The social worker collaborates with foster parents in interpreting the reasons the child was relinquished for adoption. Simple and honest written explanations which can be understood by the child are essential.

The most active participant in compiling the book should be the child. Personal treasures such as birthday cards, drawings, valentines, pictures with Santa Claus, report cards, brownie awards etc. , all contribute to a bank of memories which would otherwise be distorted or lost forever.

How do Adoptive Parents React?

The initial response has been positive. They have found the book invaluable in sorting out the child’s experiences and how past events have contributed to the child’s present level of adjustment. The worker’s example in giving the child honest explanations of his background have been welcomed by adoptive parents. Couples with previous adoption experience and older adoptees have stated they would like to have had such a book at time of adoption placement.

Adoptive parents have been creative in the on-going maintenance and development of the books. They have helped the children by adding souvenirs of events which occurred during the child’s pre-adoption visits in their home such as placemats from restaurants, used airline tickets, newspaper clippings of the first hockey game they attended as a family etc.

None of these things is expensive but with a little work, sensitivity and creativity the child has a priceless treasure – a better sense of self and his place in the universe.