Joe Campbell
“That’s inclusive, all right,” Molder said.
“You bet it is,” said Bimson, “why, they even included jazz.”
“Isn’t that carrying inclusiveness too far?”
“Only if you don’t carry tolerance far enough,” Bimson replied.
“But jazz doesn’t belong with the other genres,” Molder said. “Jazz swings, uses complex chords and is both loud and soft.”
“I understand,” Bimson said. “The other genres jerk, use simpler chords and are both loud and louder.
“In Jazz,” Molder said, ”horns outrank strings.”
“True,” said Bimson, “and in the other genres strings outrank horns. But because jazz operates on different principles is no reason to exclude it.”
“Principles are important,” Molder said.
“I know that,” said Bimson. “But the festival organizers include jazz because they’re committed to diversity and don’t want to give offense.”
“Isn’t that carrying diversity too far?
“It’s the way we do things nowadays,” Bimson said.
“Diversity can be confusing,” Molder said, “not to mention dangerous. Years ago when my dad woke up with food poisoning, he called the first doctor he could find in the phone book. Half way through describing his symptoms, he learned that he had reached a doctor of laws.”
“Not a bad choice if he was thinking of suing the store or restaurant that provided the food.”
“If it was an honorary doctor of laws,” Molder said, “he might have described his symptoms to an actor or a hockey player.”
“In our culture,” Bimson said, “doctor first meant teacher, then physician.”
“And now,” Molder said, “it also means psychologist, chiropractor, optometrist, acupuncturist, and naturopath, to name but a few healers, as well as quacks in a variety of fields and athletes, musicians, entertainers and the like who have doctor as a nickname.”
“It’s a prestigious title,” Bimson said. “I can think of few professionals who wouldn’t like to adopt it. I suspect even plumbers and electricians would like to adopt it.”
“If they do, ”Molder said, “Physicians should abandon it in the interests of public safety. Unlike physicians, plumbers and electricians make house calls.”
“Anyhow,” Bimson said, “despite anomalies like title inflation, diversity and inclusiveness are firmly entrenched. We’ve practically institutionalized them. Take marriage, for example. It includes common law relationships, polygamy, group family units and same-sex unions.
“That’s inclusive, all right,” Molder said.
“You bet it is,” said Bimson. “Why, it even includes sacramental monogamy.”
“Isn’t that carrying inclusiveness too far?”
“Have we had this conversation before?”
“I’ve got the same objection as before,” Molder said. “Monogamy doesn’t belong with the others. It’s limited to two spouses of the opposite sex, they vow publicly to stay together until death, and their relationship is potentially procreative.”
“I understand,” Bimson said. “Monogamy differs from common law relationships in commitment, polygamy and group family units in fidelity and same-sex unions in reproductive fitness. But because monogamy operates on different principles is no reason to exclude it.”
“As I said before, principles are important.”
“And as I said before, I know that,” Bimson replied. “But, again, our society includes monogamy because we’re committed to diversity and don’t want to give offense.”
“I suppose it’s decent of us to call monogamy marriage even though it differs fundamentally from the other unions we call marriage.”
“Who said anything about decency? I’m talking about tolerance,” Bimson said.
“Are you suggesting that it’s indecent to call monogamy marriage?”
“The other unions give marriage a bad name,” Bimson said. “Monogamy is what most of us have always inclined toward, because it’s best ordered to spousal fulfillment and child procreation and education.
“And the other unions?”
“They’re disordered,” Bimson said. “In one or more ways they undermine the unitive and procreative goods that monogamy supports.”
“Then why not call monogamy marriage and the others something else?”
“I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that,” Bimson said. “Besides inclusiveness, diversity, tolerance and an aversion to giving offense, our society is committed to treating all relationships equally.”
“Even when they’re unequal?”
“What you suggest would be like limiting jazz festivals to jazz,” Bimson said. “It’s not the way our society works.”
“Or doesn’t work,” Molder said.
